Wednesday, March 14, 2007

America's Next Top Spin: "The sooner we defeat Al Qaeda, the sooner we can come home"

I was supposed to rush off to a meeting tonight -- they were luring me there with promises of free pizza -- but I took a few minutes before leaving to set my VCR timer to tape America's Next Top Model while I was gone.

While I was fiddling around with the buttons on the remote, I caught a section of the evening news. They were running a story on Iraq that stopped me dead in my tracks. Even thoughts of Free Pizza flew from my brain. Why? Because the Department of Defense official being interviewed on the news had just actually said with his mouth, "The sooner we defeat Al Qaeda, the sooner we can come home". My jaw just dropped.

Let me get this straight. First Bush, Rumsfeld and Cheney claimed that they had been forced to invade Iraq because Saddam had weapons of mass destruction and was harboring Al Qaeda. Then all that proved to be untrue and there were no WMDs in Iraq and Saddam was a staunch opponent of Al Qaeda so there had been no members of Al Qaeda in Iraq either.

Then -- correct me if I am wrong -- the Bushies started to tell us that we were in Iraq to bring democracy to the country and freedom to its women. Okay. Well, we all know what happened there. Since the American occupation, women have been tortured, beaten, raped and forced to hide indoors for fear for their lives if they dare venture out on the street. Plus with all that militia thug nonsense currently going on over there, Iraqis probably had MORE democratic rights under Saddam.

And now GWB is telling us that the reason we are occupying Iraq is to defeat Al Qaeda? NOW there is Al Qaeda in Iraq? Let me get clear on this. There was NO Al Qaeda in Iraq under Saddam. And now after four years of American occupation, Iraq is now in danger of being overrun by Al Qaeda? And we can only leave Iraq if we defeat the Al Qaeda that is there now but which wasn't there before but now that WE are there is spreading like cancer?

But what does all this mean? I myself think it means that "The sooner we defeat Al Qaeda, the sooner we can come home" is now the hands-down winner of the "America's Next Top Spin" contest!

Does it also mean that Bush thinks we Americans are all morons? Don't answer that.

PS: The pizza was great. And I never did get to tape ANTM because I forgot to change the timer on the VCR to daylight savings time. But I got back from the meeting in time to watch the last 15 minutes so I know which girl is going home.

Now if we can only bring our troops home too -- before Al Qaeda overruns the whole Middle East!