Alberta's new oil reserves are HUGE: Does this mean Bush will invade Canada next?

When I opened up the San Francisco Chronicle on Sunday, these were the headlines: "Canadian oil sands -- vast reserves second only to Saudi Arabia...." Then there was a graph. Apparently, Saudi Arabia has 259 billion barrels of oil in reserve, Canada has 180 billion barrels and Iraq only has 113 billion barrels. Shhhhh! Don't tell Dubya! He'll be invading Canada within the week and we all know what this means:

Shock and Awe will be coming to Ottawa.

British Columbia will soon have its own Abu Ghraib.

Halliburton will get another 200 billion dollars in contracts, we all learn to live in terror of infidel "maple-leaf-heads" and Americans will have to go without cheap prescription drugs.

All too soon, resistance cells will be forming in Quebec while suicide bombers attack the U.S. green zone in Toronto. And Laura will soon be flying in to teach Nova Scotians how to read.