Sunday, January 14, 2007

Madame Jane Predicts: In 2007, GWB will send HIMSELF to jail!

Madame Jane predicts that soon -- very soon -- sooner than even Nancy Pelosi would expect, President [sic] George W. Bush is gonna issue yet another Special Executive Order -- or perhaps one of those Presidential Signing Statement thingies that he so proudly invented -- wherein he will actually sentence HIMSELF to 25 years in jail. And with no time off for good behavior either!

"Now why did he go and do something like that?" you might ask. Don't ask me. Ask John Grisham. He has the answer. I just finished reading Grisham's book about a Washington wheeler-dealer who had cheated too many people and stepped on too many toes and thus ended up PLEADING with the Justice Department to PLEASE put him jail! And solitary confinement would be even better! Why? So that all the enemies this dude has made over the years and all the people he has cheated and all the people who hate "The Broker" won't be able to get their hands on him.

Well. Madame Jane predicts that, in the year 2007, something very similar to that will also happen to George W. Bush.

Americans tend to be rather naive -- dare I say gullible -- and we tend to believe what we are told most of the time. BUT. If and when we finally ever DO find out that we have been tricked, used, conned, swindled, defrauded and/or cheated, we also tend to get angry. Very very angry -- angry enough to even indulge in tarring and feathering. Hey, it's happened before.

Madame Jane predicts that when it finally does become clear to even the most naive American in even the most hard-core Red State in the USA that Bush has systematically schemed us out of our wealth, our reputation, our land, our honor, our patrimony, our democracy, our justice, our way of life, our freedom and the very life-blood of our treasured sons and daughters, then America is gonna blow and blow bigtime!

And when this happens, GWB is going to start desperately looking around for any kind of spider-hole he can get his hands on in order to protect himself from the wrath of the American people. And when that happens, trust me. Paraguay is NOT going to be far enough away.

Have you ever SEEN anyone tarred and feathered? Not a pretty picture. And the people in charge of administering said tar don't just sit around waiting for it to cool to room temperature either.

Madame Jane predicts that in 2007, Americans are FINALLY going to wake up. And when they do, it might be with barrels of tar and pillows filled with goose-feathers close at hand. And when that happens, GWB is going to get down on his knees and BEG the Department of Justice to put him in jail.

It's called "protective custody".

Madame Jane predicts we will soon be saying goodbye to George W. Bush -- and Condi and Dick and Rummie and Karl and Halliburton...and all of his other "feathered friends".

PS: Am I advocating violence? No no no. Violence is WRONG! However, as a soothsayer, it is my unfortunate duty to predict -- and to warn.