Monday, June 06, 2005

Visa or Mastercard?: The new American serfs

"Wanna move to San Francisco?" Can't. I got a mortgage tying me to Utah.

"Wanna dump that job you hate?" Can't. I got a Mastercard debt I gotta pay off.

"Wanna get your kid into Harvard?" Can't. I can't afford the tuition.

"Wanna devote your life to the teachings of Christ?" Can't. I have to work off my student loan.

"Wanna be happy? Wanna be free? Wanna stand on your own two feet and be an AMERICAN?" Can't. My credit rating won't allow it.

"Wanna avoid serving in the Iraq war?" Can't. It's the only job I can find and I need a job.

"Want a new car?" Desperately. More than I want to be happy or serve my fellowman or live in a democratic country or stay out of jail or be healthy or ANYTHING!

"Congratulations. You have passed the test. You have sold your soul. You are now my serf. Sign here." In blood. In American blood.

PS: This is my "Readers Digest/Desperate Housewives" condensed version of a very interesting article by Nigel Maund entitled "The Financial Endgame Slowly Plays Out..." ( Maund maintains that debt now ties us Americans to our owners just like the serfs of feudal times were tied to theirs. Read the article then do what he suggests: Cut up all your credit cards.

"Cut up my credit cards? I can't do that!" You can't? Just remember that Gandhi, Jesus and Buddha did really well without credit cards and so did Abraham and Mohammed. Trust me. You will too. Why? Because Heaven offers a much bigger line of credit than Mastercard.

PPS: Apparently, most Bush Republicans are history buffs and are BIG into reenactments. Right now they are working on re-creating the Hoover Era. The Republican Congress must have gotten a sneak preview of "Cinderella Man" and decided they wanted to re-create all that Great Depression atmosphere again. Congratulations, guys. You are well on your way toward doing it.

Sooner than we think, the gigantic debt bubble that Bush Republicans have so carefully crafted will burst and when that happens, we will be able to re-experience -- free of charge -- such familiar Great Depression era highlights as the bread line, the soup kitchen, the dollar-an-hour minimum wage and the shanty town.

The Bush Republicans, however, need to be aware that if they successfully reenact the Great Depression Hoover Era, they may also successfully cause the reenactment of the 1776 Revolution Era shortly thereafter.