Wednesday, February 01, 2012

Cleaning out: Wall Street, wolves, Masai warriors & raw milk

Every time I see all those huge phalanxes of highly-weaponized and militarized police brigades viciously attacking protesting American citizens in cities across our country, all I can think of is this: "The cost of even one of those cops' salaries, overtime pay and elaborate gear represents at least a hundred of our children who will go without textbooks, or a fire department that will miss out on purchasing lifesaving equipment or some shoddy infrastructure in my town that will never get fixed or...."

You get the picture. That's billions of American taxpayers' dollars being spent to protect
the One Percent's right to safely gouge and enslave us. What a waste.

And as we continue to watch thousands of every-day Americans being savagely beaten and arrested in our very own country, these last few months have become a very confusing time for most of us -- but also a time that has been hopeful and rewarding.

For so many decades that it's embarrassing to think about, the needs and preferences of us average Americans have been deliberately ignored and undermined by the wealthy corporatists who own us. And apparently these oligarchs have, until now, always firmly believed that most of us Americans will continue to think and do whatever we have been told to think and do -- forever.

But now most of us lowly worms have finally started to turn.

After spending all too many years of our lives standing submissively by while everything meaningful -- from religion to lingerie -- has gotten happily vacuumed up by corporatist Blue Meanies, we Americans are finally beginning to stand up for ourselves and vote with our feet instead of with Diebold.

Human beings were never meant to have their sole purpose to be to make oligarchs rich. Doesn't even the Bible say that? Yes, I think that it does. And so does the Torah and the Qur'an for that matter. "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." That kind of stuff.

Or, as Rudyard Kipling so succinctly put it in my Franklin Daily Planner recently, "The strength of the Pack is the Wolf -- and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack". And Americans are also only as strong as our weakest links. And when too many of us become homeless, jobless, illiterate and sick, then America becomes more and more fragile -- allowing us to get picked off one by one by the very One Percent vultures who have made us this weak in the first place.

It's time to start cleaning these rapacious vultures out of our lives now, right now -- while we still can.

And speaking of cleaning out, my Chinese New Year's resolution is to eat really healthy -- and what could be more healthy than mother's milk? A mother cow's milk, that is.

And so for the next 24 hours, I'm going to follow the example of strong Masai warriors and live mostly on raw milk.


Plus, no one ever died of cancer as a result of drinking raw milk -- unlike the many people who have died of cancer after drinking uber-processed milk taken from hormone-treated, antibiotic-drugged, feed-lot-crazed cows

But before you start to guffaw and knock raw milk as being too weird or too old-fashioned or unsanitary, please do try it first. Delicious.

Here's a warning, however. A friend of mine just told me that if you are having trouble getting pregnant, raw milk will help. Hmmm. Does that mean that I'll be getting pregnant soon too? Good grief, I hope not! But drinking raw milk is also supposed to provide immuno-globulins, vitamins, enzymes, beneficial probiotic bacteria and cancer-fighting CLA, as well as
helping to prevent bone-density loss, strengthen the immune system, encourage iron assimilation and help ease constipation

But will it also turn me into a Masai warrior? Or even perhaps into a wolf? How cool would that be!

And will drinking raw milk also make me strong and invincible enough to stand up to the One Percent's slick new mercenary stormtroopers -- now playing all across America, in a city near you? Probably not, unfortunately. Sigh.


Advertizements for myself: In these hard times of brutal (and illegal) corporatist ball-busting socialism-for-the-rich-only, I am doing whatever I can to make a spare dollar. Here are some of my current alternate-economy schemes that never seem to work -- but I keep hoping!

Need an actor to play an older woman in your movie? Then I'm your man! I can portray all kinds of older women -- from judges, business execs and other insane zombies to bag ladies, cancer patients, kindly grandmothers and dying patients in rest homes. I've played them all. So send me a script and let's do this. Hollywood, here we come!

Are you a plaintiffs' attorney who is tired of writing those pesky personal injury settlement briefs all the time? No problem! I can write them for you. Years of experience. And pay me only if you win the case.

Fortune Telling: If you scan a photocopy of the lifeline on the palm of your dominant hand, e-mail it to me at jpstillwater(at)
with "Madame Jane" in the subject line, and then slip five dollars into my PayPal account, I can (and will) get Madame Jane to tell you approximately how long you are gonna live -- and also have her throw in some stuff about quality-of-life as well.


I recently got my Notary Public commission!

Need a Notary Public? Have seal, will travel. E-mail me at and I'll stamp your document, make it official and only charge $10. Of course if you live outside of Berkeley, I may have to charge travel expenses -- but am well worth it!


Want something good to read? Buy my book! "Bring Your Own Flak Jacket: Helpful Tips for Touring Today's Middle East," available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble. It's like if Jack Kerouac, Mark Twain and/or Janet Evanovich went to war.

I also wrote a book about going on Hajj (also included as a chapter in "Bring Your Own Flak Jacket," but this book is cheaper -- but it's worth buying them both!) My book on the Hajj is so outstanding that I bet even Christian fundamentalists will love it! Please buy it here:


"Imagine a world where EVERY child is wanted, nurtured, protected and loved: World peace in one generation!"
You can now buy T-shirts, coffee mugs, tote bags, truckers' caps, baby gear and/or teddy bears with this logo printed on them. They make great gifts, especially for parents and teachers. To purchase, just click here:

"Life is a competition. The winners are the ones who do the most good deeds." You can also buy T-shirts, coffee mugs, tote bags, truckers' caps, baby gear and/or teddy bears with this logo printed on them. They make great gifts, especially for those of us who are still idealists in these troubled times. To purchase, just click here: